Life in a material world is difficult. It’s not easy having a body and all this entails. There’s so much to navigate here; from food to clothing to shelter, from relationships to work, from trying to keep your kids from killing one another (kidding) to trying to keep others from killing one another (not kidding). This is not a realm of enlightened beings. Wisdom doesn’t pay the bills and love is not understood, or it is misunderstood. The first thing we can do to live gracefully here is to recognize the reality of this loka, this plane of existence. Sickness, death, and other such phenomenon are present and will always be here. Don’t buy into the modern fantasy that somehow, if you obey the proper rules — eating the right foods, taking the right medicines, joining the right belief systems, whatever the trip — you’ll somehow become immune from travails, safe and secure. Life in the world may be challenging, but it’s not a catastrophe or an accident. We each followed an energy stream that has brought us to this incarnation, this experience in time and space. If we understand how we are always following energy streams, both external and internal, we can make more informed decisions about how to flow with responsibility and empowerment. From the yogic perspective, our birth is the mathematically perfect result of our consciousness. This can be kind of odd to hear, but that’s because we have forgotten who we are before we were born. Few folks remember. However, having a poor memory doesn’t change reality. If a guy goes to work in the morning but forgets where he lives and can’t go home at night, his abode remains but he can’t enjoy the love and warmth that awaits him there. When I tell people to try and remember who there were before they were born, many do have an intuitive sense of something… maybe just barely out of reach… but something. A vague sense of light, of love, a snippet of an almost forgotten melody, a recollection and longing for something that feels like home. The almost inevitable question then becomes: If I was dwelling in a realm of love, expansion, freedom and completion, why did I leave? It’s taken me a long time to understand this dynamic, and even longer to figure out a phrase to describe it. I’m not sure it will satisfy anyone, but the best way I can put it is: “It seemed like a good idea at the time.” The beauty of remembering who you have been is that you will then realize who you will be, again, and where you will dwell after you die. This comfort and confidence cannot be found in any identity based on this world. Regardless of all this, we still have to deal with the situations we find ourselves in, with our bodies, minds, relationships— the whole mishegoss. If I may suggest, the first order of business may be to not make things worse. Avoid the self-inflicted wounds. Grant yourself permission to be as healthy and successful as you feel you have it in you to be. Remember the brouhaha about Covid? Remember being told to wear a mask, keep distant from others, have swabs stuck up your nose, and get jabs? What I’d like to propose is an alternative response to life that I’ll call: “A Pandemic of Healing.” For starters, remove your mask. The term “mask” has its etymological roots in the Latin, “persona,” from which evolved “personality.” These personae were masks worn by actors to indicate what role they were performing in a theatrical production. It’s fine to pretend to be someone else when on a stage; not so much in real life. Whatever mask you may be wearing to cover your authenticity, try taking it off. You may discover you don’t need it and you really don’t want it. Be all of who you are. Be the totality of your funky, messy self. You are always going to be filled with paradox, nuance, and ambiguity. Embrace this. You are always going to be a messy mix of characteristics. You are always going to be too complex and expansive to fit into a box. My new, favorite one-liner is: “The only people who belong in boxes are dead people.” Own all of who you are and avoid fear, guilt and shame as much as possible. These are more life-depleting than any virus. As for keeping your distance, surely it’s well and good to have reasonable social boundaries, but armoring and defensiveness just keep us stuck in the rut of same ol’ same ol’. If you’re interested in personal growth, go ahead and take chances; be vulnerable, be intimate. I knew a young man who wanted to ask a girl to dance at his high school Valentine’s Day dance. It was a big deal for him. He spoke with me about his confusion and insecurity. I encouraged him, so that when the big day arrived he was determined to follow through. At the dance, he walked across the floor to ask her. Everyone was watching. If you ever went to a high school dance, you know how he felt. He asked her and, in front of all their friends, she said, “no.” Ouch. It was hard on him at the time, but he changed after that. He become much more mature, courageous, self-contained. We adults who knew him saw his development. He didn’t get what he wanted, but he came out of it a stronger and self-possessed individual. I say to you: whatever your passion, whatever your dance hall, go for it. Even If the result is disappointing and stings a bit in the moment, the outcome is going to bring you more fully into your own glory. As for staying healthy, we yogis are waiting wait for the scientists and doctors to catch up. We already know being vital and robust is rather simple. We already know how to take care of ourselves. Modern medicine sure has made being healthy seem like a complicated thing. Spend time outside, eat moderately, exercise, keep stress to a minimal; these are the keys to health. They have been since day one. Of course, we all have our weaknesses in body and mind, and some of these are quite severe so some of this may not apply. However, by and large, for the group of people who resonate with what I am writing, you can be strong and energetic with a simple lifestyle. Trust Nature, trust God. Many years ago, I had an interesting experience while camping. I spent a couple nights by Lake Pliade, a small, beautiful spring-fed lake. I had with me a fine Buck knife, of which I was very fond. While meditating, I heard a voice say, “You’re going to lose the knife.” It was a familiar voice, one which I had always identified as “mine,” the one constantly confirming my fear and self-doubt, always casting negativity. This time, however, it seemed like a separate being was speaking. It was a curious feeling, as if the bummer inside my mind was revealed to be “not me.” I thought to myself, “Let’s see what happens with the knife. It will reveal if this voice can be trusted, or not.” I did not lose the knife. Since then, that voice has diminished power over me. I have come to realize that voice is not the “still, small voice of intuition.” Rather, it is the accumulated debris of programming from repressive external sources. I had integrated it, but now I was casting it out. We all carry this voice with us in our own ways. It’s not telling you the truth. We don’t need to listen to it. There’s no value in arguing with it, fighting with it, or trying to eradicate it. These are ineffective strategies. Simply, test it and recognize it is not yours, not the voice of your soul. I’m sharing all this because if someone hold told me, it would have saved me a lot of frustration and aggravation. From a practical, productive standpoint, our growth doesn’t need labor and strife. Our bodies and minds are part and parcel of nature. In the natural world, wonders and glories occur in a slow and steady manner. Organic development isn’t a radical leap; Mother Nature is almost lazy in her patient, almost imperceptible ways. It is not necessary, or generally helpful, to make great vows and strive for grand accomplishments. Think more in terms of 1%. What I mean is: whatever your path, go deeper by 1%. It doesn’t matter what is your personal spirituality, content is much more significant than form. Spend 1% more of your time and energy on your spiritual life. If you do this every week, by this time next year you’ll have grown by 50%, an extraordinary level. This may not be mathematically precise, but I trust you understand the message of fulfilling your potential. And, 1% is something everyone can do. Surely this is reasonable, everything else is just an excuse. So, be a person of reason— unmask, diminish fear-based boundaries, harmonize with nature, and participate in the Pandemic of Healing. |
A Pebble in My Sock
The other day, I put on some socks. Lo and behold, it was uncomfortable to walk because there was a pebble in one of the